Snow, apple cider and a shallow novel...

I've been shovelling, all day long, and frankly I've had enough. It is time to drink some hot apple cider and read a shallow, smutty novel.

The driveway is clear at this very minute and if I had to go to school at 7:50 pm I'd definitely make it. The wind is howling and the driveway may very well cease to exist by 6am. I have 240 sick days saved up. If the driveway disappears it will make me feel very nauseous and I may need to take a day off.

Boom loves the snow. He whines at the door to go out and once out in the back yard he burrows around with his head under the 45 cms of snow (18 inches for my American readers) looking for his lost treasures. Chewed up tennis balls mostly. My neighbour took a few cute shots of Boom frolicking in the snow today. Just for a bit of perspective, that sign is hidden amongst the upper branches of two young trees for much of the year!

In adoption related news the first 3 families with referrals from my agency have tentative travel dates for mid January. Bring on the babies! It is my dearest wish that wee B is waiting for me by the time they travel so that I can get some early photos of the little dude. I may not know who he is yet so I hope they take pictures of all of those precious little babies waiting patiently for their forever families.

On that note, yesterday marked 13 months since DTV. I'm going to buy wee B his first Christmas story this week to celebrate this milestone. On another family's adoption blog I read about an idea I loved...wrap 25 winter/holiday stories and have the child pick one to unwrap each day of December leading up to Christmas day. That book collection is well on it's way as I have a very serious book buying syndrome but I figure I need about 10 more stories. I'm taking suggestions in the comment section. What is your favourite holiday story? Name a new one and an old classic if you can.

Just because it isn't wrong...

I spent a Saturday afternoon with Barbara Coloroso last summer and frankly it was life changing. I could have sat and listened to this woman for hours on end and would never have been bored. Vibrant, humourous, succinct, honest. I have since read her newest book (I'm sorry if I butcher the title) Just because it isn't wrong doesn't make it right. Wow!

This book about raising a child who thinks ethically is changing the way I work with my class.

The second graders are getting it.

I have focused on 3 rules for living comfortably in a community.

1. Care deeply


2. Share generously


3. Help willingly
   

Perhaps the on-line Vietnam Adoption community might take a moment to reflect on the aforementioned rules for living. Care, share, help. Simple. The 7 year olds get it. Give it a try and if you are a reader get it at the local library and enjoy.

I'm not big on blog commenting but I could not hold myself back this week. Some of the angry opinions out there in cyber space seemed over the top. Below I have pasted in a bit of the comment I made on a popular blog (she certainly gets more viewers than I do!) in response to a very unhappy PAP.

Corruption touches all of us, around the globe, and taints my wait with worry.
In spite of that worry I choose to read these blogs of families that have gone before me. I admire their beautiful children. I celebrate the highs and lows of their journey from afar. I pay special attention to discussions of Vietnamese history, descriptions of the Hanoi area, advice about restaurants, taxis, hotels and packing lists. I choose to read and take away from my reading those tidbits that are meaningful to me and me alone. I choose to read. You choose to read.
We all have a choice here.

Don’t read. Read.

Be nasty. Be nice.

Be infuriated. Be joyful.

I know what I am choosing.

Little B, my son, may very well be waiting for me in an orphanage in Northern Vietnam at this very moment. When he arrives I want him to know all about this time of joyous anticipation.

Stressful? Yes.

Frustrating? Certainly.

Joyous? Definitely.

Another rule for living in a community? If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all. Credit for this rule goes to my mom.

Terms of reference

11 months (and 1 day)

Christmas

A New Year

Mother's Day

Summer Vacation

Back to school

Thanksgiving

It feels like such a long time

yet time is moving swiftly

My nephew

newborn to toddling

in the blink of an eye

Yet I wait a wait that seems endless

11 months in puppy time
my term of reference

Define "FEW" please

The agency has decided the numbering system was not meeting their needs so they eliminated it. No one asked me. It was meeting my needs just fine, thank you very much.
In place of the numbering system they have provided me with the following update on the status of my adoption file:

"What I can advise you is that there are only a few other families whose files were registered before yours, who are open to the placement of either a boy or girl."

So what does this mean? I haven't the faintest idea.
It sounds good. Really good. But...what is the definition of few?
If you are reading this fill up my comment section with your definition of few.
I'd love to see who is reading.

Hanging on by my fingernails..

In an effort to be an optimist I peeked at today's horoscope. I need all the external sources I can find these days. I'm not a horoscope junkie and I always, always, always ignore the bad ones...
Here it is for your viewing pleasure:

Taurus
Keep you fingers crossed, and your toes, too.
With luck, you could make a major breakthrough
right where you need it most. Mercury is in a
position to deliver a surprise and bring the solutions
you need.

I love it. I'll take whatever I can get at this point.
Halloween is coming.
Perhaps the agency director has a mercury costume planned.

Understanding the wait...

Today marks 10 months since Dossier to Vietnam. A few posts ago I wished for news by the time my DTV number reached two digits but there hasn't really been any news for me. Yes, my agency received their first orphanage referrals late in August and there is talk of our agency's program gaining 'momentum'. More referrals are on the way soon.

Soon is overused in the adoption world and I am trying to focus on the now. The waiting is hard. I'm not going to sugar coat it for you. I wash and fold and store away the hand me downs and wonder how big little b will be. I say no to nothing and explain to generous friends, neighbours and colleagues that anything I don't need will be donated to a local woman's shelter. I go to work, educate other people's children, and put away every spare penny for travel expenses and for life expenses during my 37 weeks of parental leave (making about $400/week in employment insurance). I read, research, lurk, blog (occasionally), email, and generally fret on and off about the whole adoption experience. Mostly I wait.

Waiting took on a whole new light for me today and brought a little tear to my eye. I was at our school fun fair accompianied by my best friend's four year old. We don't see each other as often as I would like but this little guy has been helping his mom pack up his "old" stuff for little b for months and months. Little b will dress in hardly worn brand names because this giant 4 year old 'only' nephew and 'only' grandchild of his loving relatives has out-grown size 6x. My little buddy hasn't mentioned little b often but did tell me last time I was up at his house visiting that he wasn't quite ready to hand down his wiggl*les guitar .

Anyway, we were walking around the school yard greeting my students and their families when we ran into my vice principal who is off on maternity leave. I opened up the hood of the stroller to take a peek at the beautiul little 3 month old girl and out of nowhere my little buddy pipes up "Oooh, is that little b?"

"No, little buddy. We can't just pick up a little b at the local school fun fair. Yes, it is taking quite a bit of time, and yes, I wish I was pushing around a stroller and introducing my little man at the school funfair, but no, that is not him."

"I've been waiting a long time! When can I play with him?"

"Soon. I hope. Soon.'

Waiting is hard.
Especially when you are four.

News In Adoption World

There is big news up here in Canadian Adoption world. It isn't my news but it still made me breathless. Watch the Canadian Blogs for your very own update.

Sending love to the happy parents and their new wee one from Vietnam.

Countdown to little b...

When I started this 'Never-ending Journey' it had an ending that the agency called 6-9 months from Dossier to Vietnam or sooner. Um, Yeah...

I'm DTV November 15th, 2006. With the original ending I'd be looking at a referral occurring between May15th and August 15th. It took 8 months to get logged in so I don't expect a referral in the next 3 weeks. I'm also thinking number 1 on the list should get a referral before me (number 27ish), to be fair. (Though I am only 8th for an infant boy.)

The newer ending of my tale was to be 9-12 months from DTV or August 15th to November 15th.

The newest and most interesting counting technique counts from the day I forked over the first bit of money to the agency (We'll call it Agency Acceptance). I've been told the numbers 12-18 months from Agency Acceptance. My Agency Acceptance day is July 27th, 2006. That would give me a referral between July 27th, 2007 and January 27th, 2008. This seems the most realistic.

So, does it matter how they count? I don't think so. The bottom line is referrals need to start so that patterns can be seen and agency guesses can begin to have a foundation in fact. The numbers are just to appease us parents. The agency is working hard to get babies paper ready. I hope. The referrals are going to arrive when the referrals arrive and not a day sooner.
I'm wishing for 2007. Please!

A friend of mine had a dream, on a specific day, in a specific month, that wee b had just been born.
I'm not typically superstitious, but...the timing could be perfect.
I wonder?

Good Wishes Abound

A very dear friend of mine sent me a good wish for wee b's quilt.

I wept when I read this poem. It was not pretty delicate weeping but rather ugly red-faced sobbing.


Enjoy!

Isn't he cute?

I was at the cottage last week and thought I would leave you with a couple of shots of my gorgeous dog.

There is no news in Adoption Land. I sent a series of questions off to the program manager on Wednesday and hope to hear back today. I'm really hoping that the first referrals for the agency come through this month. I'm feeling optimism in the air, windy, cool, cloudy optimism, but optimism none the less.

I Love...

I love teaching. I especially enjoy building the foundations of life long reading in my students. As the end of the year approaches some teachers sit the kids down in front of a DVD so that deadlines for paper filing and bulletin board clearing can be met. I bring 2 large bins of my favourite children's stories out of hiding. Books that have not made it onto my many classroom bookshelves. The bins contain old favourites and newer series books, comics and magazines, novels, short stories and jokes. The kids huddle around those 'new ' books and read and read and read...a couple of hours a day for 3 or 4 days. I get my crap under control. The kids think they have hit the jackpot. DVDs can wait until rainy July days when boredom sets in. My students all seem to have DVD players but far too many of them don't have a collection of well loved books.

And today? I also love that summer break is 4 school days away.

I am accepting suggestions for my own summer reading. Do you have an adoption or Vietnam read that I must not miss? I have 8 cottage lounge chair days to fill up the week after next.

Every Dog Needs His Boy

Boomer is waiting for wee B to join the family. A goalie to join the game of life. Someone to chase after and run from depending on his mood. An evening wrestling partner whose stuffing won't fall out. A consistent source of treats that don't contain organic vegies or all natural lamb and rice. Cuddler, ball kicker, hole digger and mud pie maker.

Right now Boomer has to make the mud pies all by himself.

It's so depressing!

I'll be counting by the month, thank you very much!

Sitting here, tired of June and the end of the year rush, I just realized it is June 15th. DTV exactly 7 months ago. Exactly 1 year and 1 week since meeting with my social worker for the first time. Many bloggers out there wishing for news, waiting by the phone and wondering exactly what is happening when 'they' say your file is in process have a day count on their blog. I can't go there. 7 is such a nice small number. The kids in my class would say it lives in the ones house. I'd love a referral before my wait time has to move to the tens house please. Or at least confirmation that my file no longer languishes on a desk at the DIA.